Lost Along The Day

Is it narcissistic of me to be listening to my own song while I write this? Ah well, that's that...can't help it if "Endless Night" is rather kickass in its own right.
EDIT : 'hi-fidelity lows' playlist back on (funny how I seem to write here when I'm listening to it) 

It's been over two months since I wrote anything....but as always, the only reason is that there wasn't much to write about. However, I was looking back at all that has happened since I last wrote here, and I realised I've just bene passing off events as inconsequential even though they're noteworthy. Why? No fuckin' clue. If any of you have any ideas, you know where to find me.

So all those months of sitting at home and labouring over the GRE lead to no spectacular result...i scored a 1280 out of 1600. It's not that bad, but personally I thought 1300 would be respectable, and the itch for those last 20 marks is a bitch (haha) so I'm taking it again in about five days.

Every plan that was being formulated and incubated since April has been cancelled or delayed.
The EP is nowhere. We weren't even able to start recording.
I still haven't gone to Bangalore.
I became single again with absolutely no prospects of that changing anytime in the future.
(as mentioned before) GRE = Fail. (at least the first attempt)
Black Market Collective/Gangotri/Makeshift after what I'd consider a pretty good run is over murky waters. Without Ushinor and Nikhil we really don't have enough directional talent to pull off a sucessful run. I highly doubt we'll find musicians to trace their credentials...

Other events that have transpired in the past couple of months:
I had a legendary party and it was good.
I went to Japan for 3 days (this will get its own post soon)
Anna Kaushik came back to the country and it was awesome. She is one of the coolest people I know and she made my 'summer' awesome. She's gone back to Holland and I miss her.
Jayu and I were up to no good as usual (details of this may also find itself a dedicated post soon)

NTU plans have also been postponed. The courses I want to apply to only have August intakes (that means, the courses only start in August). I wasn't aware of this till recently all thanks to my brilliant skills of not looking at things properly. Also, the sound course at SAE doesn't start before April. All of this basically implies that I have nothing to do till then. Of course, my parents know nothing of any of this.

EDIT : What I was calling fate, just might be my dad being anal. The point being, I just got a joining date at TCS. It's the end of the month and it's in Chennai. If I take it, I get to earn, get out of the house and have something to do till I leave (hopefully) for Singapore in April. But it also means bidding my people farewell sooner than I thought and giving up all hopes of playing live anytime soon.

I feel like this is the lowest I've been all year. Although I haven't ever mentioned the concept of 'the void' here or to many people in general, I feel it's presence once more..
The void is this black hole I feel inside of me. Yknow how every one has that sinking feeling? Well, this is like that, but instead of sinking, there's emptiness..so much so that it seems like a black hole. I like to call it the void.
I miss everyone. I miss being carefree. I miss doing random shit even when I'm alone. The only times I think I've genuinely laughed recently have been doing and watching random shit with Jayu. I don't mean your regular haha, I mean literal outbursts! It's like I'm slowly getting desensitized and that truly scares me.
If I had to think of one thing thats keeping me going(if this even counts as that), I can't...It'll come to me eventually but as of now, I have no fuckin' clue...

"Out of the way, it's a busy day
Ive got things on my mind.
For the want of the price of tea and a slice
The old man died."

Pink Floyd really got it right.